Fists are up ready to fight...

We are constantly battling between the two of us. I love her so much and she has such a sweet spirit and a tender heart but we really but heads on most things. I think what it comes down to is I want it my way and she wants it hers. There's no meeting in the middle between the two of us. Whether we are fighting over her wearing basketball shorts when it's 30° outside or wearing runners when she needs to wear something a little bit nicer, or when she wants to put her hair in a ponytail or not wash it for two more days, or it's a battle of having to clean her room or making me wait after I asked her to do something. There always seems to be something that we are arguing about. 

She loves poppy so much she's always wanting to hold her and help with her. She wants to do a lot herself and it's hard for me to allow her to help me with poppy being so fussy lately.  She is very smart but really struggles with reading. We sit and try to read with her and try to explain ways to make it easier but she just doesn't have the time or patience to listen. I have been catching her in some small lies and try to explain why it's important to tell the truth. Anything from not changing her underwear for several days because she doesn't like the way it feels to telling me that she has read her book for three minutes when all she really did was look at the pictures. Understanding that she is only eight, I need to start to let some of my control issues go. 

Now that she thinks she is loving activity days with so many fun friends. She was also loving playing with our neighbor Claire and with Taylor. Any day that she can't play with Taylor she gets angry at me.  

She has such a beautiful voice and I would really like to try and get her in singing lessons, it's just getting her out of her shell enough so that she's not too shy to sing out. I love that girl so much, we just got to learn how to get along. 

This month I decided to take her on a date to the Cirque du Soleil horse show. It is called Cavallia. We went out for dinner with the Haslam's and then went to the show. It was spectacular! She really loves horses and so do I, so the two of us really enjoyed watching all of the acrobats and the horses do tricks. It was a beautiful show. I'm hoping to be able to put her in a horse camp for a week this summer before we head up to Canada so that she can be a little bit more familiar around horses. I really love how much she loves animals. She loves the real ones but equally she loves the fake ones. Her bed is completely covered and stuffed animals. Every time I ask her to put about half away she can never decide so she ends up sleeping with about 30 to 50 stuffed animals and dolls every night. They completely take over her bed! It's totally ridiculous, but I understand that she is eight and need to allow her to love on her animals while she is still young.

That boots

This kid is honestly too fast and too busy to get very many pictures of him. When he is with me he is feeding the baby or holding the baby or kissing the baby. He loves her so much. He is such a light and joy in our home and makes me smile every day. He's a great listener and a great brother. He is always giving and helping. He does have a hard time listening and so I have to tell him things several times. He also still thinks potty talk is hilarious, I think as a boy this may never go away!! 

He is doing awesome at school. His reading is getting so much better and he aces all of his spelling tests. He loves when I packed him a lunch and begs me almost every day to send a lunch with him. I guess I make a pretty mean turkey sandwich! 

Any chance he has to be outside and play he will take. His shoes and pants are always wet or dirty. I need a quick fix on how to dry and clean runners. 

 It is been snowing and icing the last two days and he can't help but be outside playing in the snow digging it up and breaking the ice apart. Today after I pick him up from school he told me that another kid made him jump in a  puddle. I asked him who is in charge of him, somebody else or himself. He started to giggle and finally confessed that he wanted to jump in the puddles himself. Of course his dry shoes got soaking wet.

And then there's Courtney

Courtney has been an interesting age. I forget how the kids act when they're at this age.

She is four and is such a handful. She has been crying and whining about almost everything that happens in her life. She has super high highs and super low lows. She still sucks her blanket which is affecting her bite and makes her chin really dry. I don't know how to make her stop sucking on her blanket, it's disgusting and stinky. She has taken up a new hobby of coloring on anything that she can find. Anytime she finds a pen or a pencil upstairs she has decided that she should color on something. She has no colored on our front closet door, and wall, Brian's computer screen, friends piano book, toilet seat, Natalie's American girl doll bed, and their bunk bed. It's super frustrating and I don't know how many more times I have to tell her that she is not allowed to color – ever! 

She has been loving imaginary play time, which is great. One of her favorite things to do is go in my bathroom and get out all of my lotions and hair spray bottles and lined them up on the counter and pretend they are a family. She gives them all names and plays "house". Yesterday I put her in the bathtub and got her all clean, I left the room to let her play for a few minutes. When I went back into get her out of the tub, she had emptied out an entire container of my bio silk. This is a hair product I put in my hair to make it shiny and smooth. It is basically like a castor oil consistency. She had emptied the entire bottle into the bathtub with her. The sides of the bathtub were completely coated in a greasy almost Crisco type consistency. Her body was also coated in this greasy substance and looks like water coming off of the docs back. It was totally disgusting.I tried to get her clean and it took me a long time with a lot of bleach and soap to get the bathtub clean.  

On a brighter note, This girl is constantly singing. She also loves her preschool. I love having her at the school she's not learning about God and Jesus. Today she told me about a few and Jesus' many miracles. It is so nice to hear her talking about stories from the Bible. The sad thing is we have already taught her a bunch of the stuff at home, but for some reason she only retains it when her school teaches her! 

Poppy update

You don't understand the love of a mother until you become one. The worry that you have for each of your children becomes all-consuming when there something you have to worry about. Usually I try not to think about the future because I know I would make myself sick with worry about what will happen to my children and where they will turn out.  

I have worries for poppy right now. Worries for her health. I know we are very blessed to have 4 healthy children and I am so grateful for that. I feel like recently I have stumbled upon many children who are sick and struggling with things that are very serious even life-threatening. But for me my sweet poppies health is my concern right now. It is what I know. She has had a hard time gaining weight and games very slowly. I took her in about three weeks ago, well I took Courtney and in the doctor with poppy because she looked tiny. She weighed in at 10 lbs. 8 oz., well this week I have noticed that she just seems a little bit small and that her slow weight gain has decreased. I also have been worried about her because she's been really fussy the last days which is very unlike her. As you can tell from all these beautiful pictures that I have posted of poppy she's a very happy sweet baby. 

So finally today I took puppy into see the doctor again. She weighed her and she still weighed 10 lbs. 8 oz. she hasn't grown in three weeks and she went from the 6th percentile to the 3rd percentile. The doctor gave me some medicine for reflux, new formula so that she wouldn't spit up, and juice to help her poop. She has been constipated and she spits up enough to soak through to burp cloths every time she eats. I'm sure she is spitting up at least a quarter of her meal. We are going to see where this goes and if she's better by Friday then great. If she's not better by Friday then we have scheduled a G.I. and bowel test so that we can see if there's any kind of blockage or kink going on inside. I know everything will be fine whatever way it goes, we will just find the treatment that she needs. I just hate to see my little baby sad and in pain.

Other than that she is the happiest sweetest little angel in our home. The kids still love on her like crazy and cannot walk into a room without kissing her and wanting to hold her. She is the first thing they want to see when they wake up and the last thing they want to kiss when they go to bed. She brings her joy and happiness to our home that I never imagined. 

BCF - Best Cousins Forever

Natalie and Taylor had their 2nd grade performance of "Suessical" It was adorable. They dressed up as thing 1 and thing 2 and I made their costumes so so easily. It was great. They each had a little part. Tay spoke a line and Natalie ran a  fish across stage. I knew she was nervous from the way she was running but she was so proud of herself for doing it. It was cute and they were cute. Love these two best buds. I hope they stay like this forever. They fight like sisters but they also play and love eachother like best friends. They are total besties. I love that my sister lives to close to me and I can see her all the time and the kids can all be together often. I know Brian's family is close, but it is crazy how even 30 minutes make it much more difficult to see people. Libby literally lives around the corner from me and so the kids walk home together every single day. I love it.

 Poppy is getting all the attention a little gal could ever ask for. I have been saying "get out of her face" and "leave her alone" so much lately, and I think I am going to stop. I don't care if they are in her face, Poppy isn't bothered by it and I don't want it to stop. I hope they always dote on their little sister Poppy, her whole entire life. Boys especially cant come in a room that she is in and not kiss her somewhere. Natalie also wants to hold her all the time and kiss on her all the time. I am glad they are actually good helpers cause they can help to hold, feed, and carry her if I need them.

 That little Poppy is 3 months old in a few days and we were in the Dr today for Courtney and the Doc wanted to weigh her. She weighed in at 10 lb 8 oz which is awesome, slow... but awesome. She is a little petite thing but full of spunk and happiness already. She spits up after every meal and soaks through a burp cloth every time. She smiles all day long and sleeps really well at night. She is even in her own room!!! ahhh!!! I miss her sometimes in our room but I know she is ready and she is doing so good and letting me Sleep! GO POPPY!

 

Beutiful Girls

This last weekend was a wonderful weekend. A few months ago we were able to have Natalie's baptism and Summers baby blessing... this weekend it was Taylors baptism and Poppy's baby blessing. Both were beautiful events and both girls looks gorgeous.

 

 Mom and Dad came into town, and although Dad was only here for less than 24 hours it was still wonderful to have him here to be with us on a special weekend. In addition, Drew received the priesthood as well. Anyway, Brian gave the most beautiful blessing to our sweet Poppy Anne. Afterwards, he said that she spat out her soother and stared and smiled at Brian the whole time. She was very sweet, just as she is all of the time. We were able to have 4 full rows and 3 side rows taken up with so much family and so many friends that were there to love and support. She wore the same beautiful dress that Natalie and Courtney wore on their blessing day as well. Heather gave me one of her special true birds headbands and it was perfect for her sweet head.

I feel very blessed. I have 4 healthy happy children. Well they are mostly happy! They give me a run for my money but they are mine and I love them no matter what they say or do to me! Life is hard and it is emotional and there are so many ups and downs. It is so important for us to rely on the power of Prayer, Faith and the atonement to help us through this life. I don't know how else we would make it. I am blessed to have my mother on this earth still, as I just cant even imagine living life without her. I cant imagine having this sweet baby not know her Nana. I am everyday grateful that The Lord allowed her to continue on this earth. I am grateful for a husband who loves us and loves the gospel with all of his heart. He is strong and humble, he is tender and kind, he is loving and has such a strong testimony of our Lord and Savior. I am grateful for my testimony and my knowledge of the truthfulness of this gospel. I see what it does in my life, in my kids and family, and I see it in the youth of the church. Having a calling in the Stake Young Womens has helped me to have a love for them and a deeper understanding of the saviors love for all. Each Young women is so unique and has her own trials as well as her own talents. She is individually beautiful and I love to see them as Christ sees them.

 I just feel very overwhelmed and blessed.